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Speed Dating

6/2/2004

Speed Dating

Every now and then you are asked to do something that you might not want to participate in or ever think of doing. Then there are times when you are given the chance to do something out of the norm for free, so you might be more inclined to go for it! When it comes to meeting someone to possibly date, there are many ways to go about it. I for one have not perfected the art of dating, so I am ready for anything!

Speed-dating or pre-dating events have been profiled in many forms of media, such as TV, newspapers, magazines and of course via the internet. Maybe you have watched episodes of “Sex and the City” or TV movies that have captured the realistic elements that are involved in this new wave of dating. I for one never thought the terms pre or speed would be attached to any area of my dating career. Just like technology however, society and life choices change as well.

Several weeks ago I received an e-mail inviting me to partake in a pre-dating event of my choice. I clicked on the link provided and started to read about success stories, how it works, the testimonials, and of course tips on how to be a success. At first I was very weary of going to an event, even though it was free. What if I knew someone, or even worse…. dated someone who I had to talk too? The pros and cons bounced around in my head and I debated for a day or two. Finally, after reading an article that a friend of mine wrote about her pre-dating event, I decided that it would be if anything an experience; at least I would be able to say that I did something like this and who knows how the ending might unfold. I registered; I committed and marked it on my calendar. I was dreading it and a nervous wreck every time something related to the word “date” popped into my mind.

Tuesday, August 12, 2003 came faster then I had hoped and I found myself debating on what one would wear to an event like this. Being comfortable with myself would help with my overall attitude, so I opted for a pair of complimentary jeans, a cute top and low-key accessories. The event that I chose was the Single Professionals, ages 24-34 at Doc Holidays in New Cumberland at 8:30 PM.

They tell you to arrive early to register for the event, but I arrived early to park my ass at the bar and release some of the nerves that were festering deep from my toes to the tip top of my head. After I grabbed my not so strong beverage, I took off to find the room of potential suitors. Jaynie, the event coordinator, immediately introduced herself to me and to place me at the pre-assinged table that I would be positioned at for the evening. Jaynie had read several of my articles and recognized me from the pictures posted on the website. I was thankful that she introduced herself to me, by doing do she relaxed me immensely and I was unwinding bit by bit.

Pre-dating usually consists of an even ratio of men to women, but this night one of the girls didn't show. The ratio was an odd number of men to women. For some reason I envisioned a huge amount of people being ushered to my table and whisked away at the ring of a bell. But I was wrong and very glad that it was on the smaller side. I think I would have become very bored sooner or later with a larger crowd.

Jaynie sat me at table number 1 with my nametag, a pen and a piece of paper to take notes on my men and little place cards with random questions just in case you need them for conversation. I checked over the note cards and found them strange in nature except for one question. “If you were kicked out of the United States, where would you go?” I love to travel and was curious what the answers would be. After several minutes everyone arrived and Jaynie started to go over the process, purpose and outcome of what was about to begin. The ladies sit at the designated table, while the men rotate and make their way to them. Each person gets an even amount of time at every table and if a match is made, the coordinator will exchange information with both parties the next day. As I mentioned before, the range of age was 24-34, but as I took a glance around the room I noticed that the majority of the group was late 20's to mid and late 30's; both male and female. I would be willing to bet that me, at the ripe age of 25 was the youngest.

Ding!! And we are off. I was unwinding a little and ready for my first victim. Given the situation, I love to chat it up and talk someone's ear off! I asked my one question from the icebreaker card and we ran our mouths past the ding of the first bell. With the ring, I jumped inside because I forgot that the ringing of a bell meant the next man at my table. Thank goodness for the ringing of Jaynie's bell, I think it scared my nerves away!

By the fourth man that I met the questions had become very redundant and I was ready for something else. Another drink! Break time, thank goodness. I needed to refresh my beverage, so I headed to the bar. What did I find? An overly good-looking bartender; refreshing eye candy after a room full of not so good-looking men. I proceeded to flirt with him for a bit and went back in for the second half of my pre-dates.

Back to the rest of the men that had signed up for a dating event; I was curious to know how many of them had tried this process of meeting people before, I would have guessed 50%, but no, a healthy 80% had answered that this event had been #2 or #3 for them. They were pros by now, lucky me! The men that were presented to me were very nice, all of them had jobs and most of them were from the area. I also asked all of the men my one question for the evening from the cards provided as an icebreaker. The answers consisted of Paris, Canada, Australia and Mexico. Nice.

The event wrapped up and I was approached by one of the men to have a drink at the bar. I said yes and off to the bar we went. He was a very nice man and we had great conversation, but nothing I would pursue. A jazz band was playing so I enjoyed the drink and headed out to meet up with friends.

I decided to tell several of the men that I was writing an article on my pre-dating experience. The reactions that I received were mixed, but filled with questions on what I thought of the experience so far. Jaynie was very nice and professional. When I decided to attend a pre-dating event I decided I was going to be 100% honest about everything, but I wonder if everyone takes the same approach. At first I was very nervous but as soon as I sat down it was very different then I expected. I expected a different atmosphere, but other then that everything I have heard or read about was exactly the same.

All in all, the event was a well-balanced memory. I had a great time chatting with both ends of the personality spectrum and everything in between. When given the chance to sneak a peak, I observed others around me and met some very interesting people. None of the men appealed to me. They were all nice, very easy to talk with and I wish them all the best of luck. I would recommend this dating approach to meet the opposite or same sex if they needed an idea besides the usual ways society